Your Symphony

What do buffalo chicken sandwiches, Jesus, and music theory have in common? I love all of them. I can describe the Savior of the universe and a very unhealthy sandwich with the same word.

Isn't that obnoxious?
Words are funny like that.
I wish we could save some or -smith some, forget or dismiss some. 
Each holds so much weight
                                 meaning
                                 depth
Each word pays a price, holds a debt, costs a fee
Yet we throw them around like they're abundant and free
Do you mean what you say and say what you mean?
Someone is listening to
Every
Last
Word
Receiving them
Perceiving them
Dissecting them
Redirecting them
Your words are all you have at the end of every day
Your words are all they're left with when you've turned and walked away.
Have you thought about your words and how they feel outside?
To every ear that hears them?
Every ear that holds them?
Minds are clay, and your words will mold them.
Words are a privilege, not a right. They define us, undermine us, burn, build, and bite.
So think them through, don't throw them away. Use them, refuse them, and never abuse them.
Shape them how you please
But never forget
That someone hears every syllable silly, sad, and sweet
All strung along as your symphony.

What If?

Think about it.


How many What Ifs are floating around this world? For every What If there are countless If, Thens and for each If, Then there's always a Why Not. What if I had? What if I hadn't? What then?  Why that? Why not? Why me? Why not? 

So many potential paths for one life to take, each What If creates another fork in the road.  But what if I choose the wrong fork? Will I ever know the difference? Will it even make a difference? (Is it even possible for it to not?)

The secret is to harness the What Ifs and turn them into Let's Gos and Might As Wells and Don't Look Backs. If we always look back, we'll always ask "what if" and frankly, I'm tired of the unknown. I'm tired of the wondering. I'm tired of being disappointed for something that might have never happened anyway. I know where I am, and I know where I am going. I don't know how I will get there but the journey is half the battle. And someday, I will stand on the top of my mountain and look down at the webbed trail of Why Nots and see how they weave within the Don't Look Backs and over-power the What Ifs to form one huge, great I Am.


Think again.

Little Miss Perfect(?)

They never said life was fair but this is getting out of hand.
I've mastered the classics, made the grade, raised the bar, set the standard. I am Her, I am It... I am No one. They said "you can be anything you set your mind to" but they all lied. Surprise! Here's my life! I've done it all, and for what? 

Here stands Little Miss Perfect. College degree, graduated with honors. Straight A student. Teacher's pet. Talented musician. Published author. Kind. Funny. Caring. Generous. Intelligent. Bright blue eyes. Killer smile. Showers often.

Remember the girl who slept around in high school? She's now happily married. Or the one who got pregnant by mistake? Happily married, owns a house, and has a third on the way. That guy who dropped out of college? Has a career that he loves. Remember the guy who got arrested? He's living the dream, traveling the world, making millions.

But what about me? I didn't make your mistakes! But they seemed to win you your life. How did I miss the memo? Did I get off at the wrong stop?

Slight OCD tendencies. Many thoughts, few friends. Single. Tossed aside. Pushed away. Never good enough. Dead-end jobs. Owns nothing. Owes everything. No one to tell good night. No one to comfort. No one to care for.

I saw a shooting star, and I made a wish. I watched it journey across the sky, through the darkness of creation. In the end, that star went nowhere. It fell. It burned out, fizzled away, lost its light to the darkness. So much for that wish. There's been a shift. A tilt of the earth on its axis, and a life spins out of control. I have everything. I have nothing. I have God, and that is enough. It has to be, because there is nowhere else to turn.

If I could only say...

Everyone deserves someone, don't you think? It's truth, and it's here to save you. God has a plan. For me, for you. For me and you? 

I want to kiss your smile and drink your eyes. Drown in your laughter, swim in your thoughts. 

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a hope and a future." 

Is there any greater promise? Have you ever heard more beautiful words? I'm here to let you know, and to let myself know, that we are worthy. That we are able. We are blessed and we are blessings. 

There is so much to love.